Browse Forums General Discussion 1 Sep 09, 2008 12:19 pm This might be a bit of a downer question, but has anyone ever sort of gone a bit overboard with spending for renovations and beautifying their home, and then when it was all done, despite the fact you’re very pleased with how it looks and it looks great and all that, you feel empty and stressed inside?
I haven’t even started any of my reno’s yet, but I’m a bit concerned that once it’s all done I’m still going to feel lost and scared because I’m sad about moving house, and I think part of me is using this hyper organisation thing I’m doing (I’m organising everything about the move, changing addresses, sending out things, arranging quotes, deciding colours and how I want things and all of that, cause my partner works a lot more hours than me so hasn’t got time) and the fact I want our new place to look PERFECT as a coping mechanism so I won’t be so sad and lost after moving. But I know I still will be. So I don’t want to spend too much. Even just on the basic things, we’re spending a lot though I feel. Painting, carpet, cleaning and colouring of grout, and actually moving in is costing a total of about $10,000. EEEP! How the hell did I become a senior member!? I know nothing! Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 2Sep 09, 2008 12:59 pm We moved 2 weekends ago, and I got a feral flu promptly afterwards, from stress levels sapping my immune system, been out of it for a week. I think I'm so excited about slowly doing reno stuff for the next 10 years (I love to DIY) that these thoughts are keeping my mind occupid enough not to feel sad or lost about moving. But to be honest I was very ready to move from our old place, so don't think I would feel sad anyway!
I don't think you should worry about what you've spent as long as it's in your budget. If you can afford it, that's great, you're doing what you want to do to have your home the way you like it. If you are over-spending however you should probably stop and think about *why* you are over-spending, to compensate for sad feelings... why are you sad about moving?? Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 3Sep 09, 2008 1:04 pm do you want the final results?
we are 90% through renovating our house and our goals have changed and we don't know if we want a house at the moment ... if we had sat down much earlier and thought about this we may have come to similar conclusions and saved allot of time (money wise we will still make money so its just time we are losing) Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 4Sep 09, 2008 1:16 pm I can sympathise with you completely.
I brought my 1st house in July and every 2nd week I resent buying it because of xyz (this week its because of the kitchen obviously) but I try and tell myself I'm here, lets just do the best we can. I miss my old house that I owned with my ex as it was sooo much better but I certaintly couldn't afford to take it off him. My budget has blown out completely and if it wasn't for the staff purchasy system we have at work - we're allowed to buy building materials/work and have it debited out of our pay fortnightly (I work for a construction company) then nothing would ever of even started being done. I guess for me its because I am working so much for so little return and I have no time to do anything and I am sick of looking at everything thinking that needs to be fixed Trying to make it mine! Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 5Sep 09, 2008 2:11 pm Thanks for the replies.
I’m sad about moving for a few reasons… 1. Mainly I’m just silly. Lol. I am SO overly sentimental and I get into majorly set routines and my mind tends to think in terms of, “This is the last time I’ll ever be able to walk from our place here along the beach to have dinner at Broadbeach” and so on and so on…it’s just me being silly and not able to cope with change. I’ve always been like this. 2. I do like our place now. It’s been my home for over 5 years, and it was my first place living independently from my parents, and also my first place living with my partner, and also my first place living in QLD after moving out of home in Melbourne. There are many things about it I am looking forward to NOT having to live with though, which is good. Things like the lack of dishwasher, the constant buzzing sound in the void behind the bathroom that we can’t do anything about, the noisy neighbours downstairs who are excessively loud most nights of the week, and various other little things. 3. I’m scared of having similar issues at our new place (mainly with noisy neighbours). 4. I’m scared of being on edge all the time, at least for a while, because it’s on the ground floor and I’m not used to that. I have lived on the first floor for 5 years and have become accustomed to nobody being able to just walk by and see me inside…whenever I’m at my new place waiting for tradespeople and I see someone wander by, I sort of jump. I’m also nervous because even though the area is nice, it’s apparently had/has a bit of a crime issue. Petty burglaries and stuff. We’re all insured, but it still scares me cause you can’t replace certain things with money. Also it scares me just the thought of someone standing on our balcony trying to get in…or if we’re not home, breaking in. I fear coming home one day and finding the door open or a window smashed. We’ve had all the locks changed and also a new lock put on the study window, and also some metal plates put on the 3 security screen doors near the key lock area, cause the wire mesh had been cut on every one of them, as if someone had tried to get in by cutting/tearing the mesh and trying to open the door from the inside. That scares me, just that someone was trying to do that, and on all doors. (2 at the front, 1 at the back, in the bedroom) 5. I will REALLY miss the area. I love my walks down by the beach and through this park at the end of our street. I’ve always loved the whole area, and if I had a choice I’d be living there, but…it’s WAY out of my price range, so I have to just let it go. At least for now. Meh. How the hell did I become a senior member!? I know nothing! Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 6Sep 09, 2008 2:35 pm I have just moved into our new home and I could'nt wait to get out of our rental property. Now were excited about the prospect of doing reno stuff and we sit and look at the room and say hey what do you think it would look like if we did this. I find it very exciting and can't wait to start........except we have to now save some money as we used most of our savings on all the purchase fee's
but in a month or two we will begin If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it. W.C. Fields Brought Established. Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 7Sep 09, 2008 2:52 pm grace_slick Thanks for the replies. I’m sad about moving for a few reasons… 1. Mainly I’m just silly. Lol. I am SO overly sentimental and I get into majorly set routines and my mind tends to think in terms of, “This is the last time I’ll ever be able to walk from our place here along the beach to have dinner at Broadbeach” and so on and so on…it’s just me being silly and not able to cope with change. I’ve always been like this. But each time something changed, you got used to it, right? You were strong enough to cope, so I'm sure you'll be strong enough this time =) Quote: 2. I do like our place now. It’s been my home for over 5 years, and it was my first place living independently from my parents, and also my first place living with my partner, and also my first place living in QLD after moving out of home in Melbourne. There are many things about it I am looking forward to NOT having to live with though, which is good. Things like the lack of dishwasher, the constant buzzing sound in the void behind the bathroom that we can’t do anything about, the noisy neighbours downstairs who are excessively loud most nights of the week, and various other little things. We lived 2 years without a dishwasher and I'll tell you something for nothing, dishwashers are the best invention EVER. We had a really crap day just after we'd moved in, tidying up the old place ready for inspection, I was just getting sick and it was a really yuk day... but we came home to our new place, and I emptied out the newly washed dishes and it made me SO HAPPY. haha Quote: 3. I’m scared of having similar issues at our new place (mainly with noisy neighbours). Yeah that sucks, but the beauty is you can do your best to minimise noise in your place as you own it now. Double glazing, insulating, all that stuff will help. Quote: 4. I’m scared of being on edge all the time, at least for a while, because it’s on the ground floor and I’m not used to that. I have lived on the first floor for 5 years and have become accustomed to nobody being able to just walk by and see me inside…whenever I’m at my new place waiting for tradespeople and I see someone wander by, I sort of jump. I’m also nervous because even though the area is nice, it’s apparently had/has a bit of a crime issue. Petty burglaries and stuff. We’re all insured, but it still scares me cause you can’t replace certain things with money. Also it scares me just the thought of someone standing on our balcony trying to get in…or if we’re not home, breaking in. I fear coming home one day and finding the door open or a window smashed. We’ve had all the locks changed and also a new lock put on the study window, and also some metal plates put on the 3 security screen doors near the key lock area, cause the wire mesh had been cut on every one of them, as if someone had tried to get in by cutting/tearing the mesh and trying to open the door from the inside. That scares me, just that someone was trying to do that, and on all doors. (2 at the front, 1 at the back, in the bedroom) I am the same! I always think someone is breaking in, I don't know why. All you can do is make it as safe as you can and try to relax. You could always get a sensor alarm if you are still worried about it, but I would say with the measures you've already taken most petty thieves would give up pretty quickly. I think only time will help this, getting to know the area better and trusting it a bit more. Even the best areas are never 100% crime free. Quote: 5. I will REALLY miss the area. I love my walks down by the beach and through this park at the end of our street. I’ve always loved the whole area, and if I had a choice I’d be living there, but…it’s WAY out of my price range, so I have to just let it go. At least for now. Meh. Yeah that's a bugger. I'm sure you will find things to love about your new area too though! Just give it time. Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 8Sep 09, 2008 4:51 pm Thanks so much for that Mikaela! That was a really nice and thoughtful post.
I think definitely time will help me relax a bit re the getting burgled thing. I keep trying to rationalise everything in my head...like, petty thieves (teenagers, etc) wouldn't keep trying with our place once they see there's security doors with those plates on them, and even if they did manage to tear the wire near the lock, the lock on the security door has a flick thing and a key lock, and then the main sliding glass doors have a lockable bolt into the ceiling. So they'd probably not bother and move on to the next place, eh? People who are more serious about breaking in and who would remove the screen from its hinges and then break the sliding glass doors with a brick or something, they're the ones who scare me. My family was broken into 3 times in 20 years living in Melbourne and each time they broke windows to get in. You can't do much about that I guess. We can't afford that super tough glass that doesn't break. Then there are the wackos who break in knowing you're there and just stand there watching you sleeping or something. lol. I don't want to dwell on that!!! Anyway, I do like the area, and we are familiar with it. It has several perks our current area, though lovely, lacks. I can walk to work in 15 minutes so I won't have to get any buses anymore (neither of us drive), it's a 10-15 minute walk to the heart of Surfers Paradise, and we're literally 2 blocks around the corner from the main cafe & shopping street on Chevron Island (where we'll be living), which has sort of a nice small village street type atmosphere. So yeah...I'll be ok. I just hate change, but I'll be ok. Thanks again! PS. Dishwashers are beautiful. I grew up with one and these past 5 years have been dishwashing hell! lol How the hell did I become a senior member!? I know nothing! Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 9Sep 09, 2008 4:52 pm You need the professional services of a head shrink not a builder.
Pat the draftie. Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 10Sep 09, 2008 5:01 pm Oh gee, thanks! lol How the hell did I become a senior member!? I know nothing! Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 11Sep 09, 2008 6:08 pm Once you have settled in I'm sure you'll love your new place. You have obviously put a lot of time and thought (and money!) into making it a place that you will enjoy.
I can relate to feeling a bit funny about moving house. I'm very excited about our new place but still feel a bit nervous about leaving where we are now. I'm sure you'll be fine. Take care. Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 12Sep 09, 2008 6:24 pm Don't worry grace, I felt like that with the last move and now, and I haven't even moved yet. We had been in our first house 17 years, kids grew up there, made great friends and I was so upset..UNTIL I drove out the driveway forever - all better. Same with this one, we are renting our house back till our other is built and I thought I would be sad but I can't wait now. You'll be fine, think positive. New beginnings, it's exciting Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 13Sep 10, 2008 2:23 am I wholeheartedly understand graceslick
We've spent 18 months planning and building our house and I'm starting to feel flat about the whole thing. Its nothing to do with needing a shrink but more about spending money, time and effort on a new project and hoping it will work out well. Just think (I keep reminding myself) that you can sell it if it doesn't work out. Its just a house (or flat) ... four walls and a roof. The memories will come along with you as will all you furniture, friends and personal items. Give yourself 12 months and then reassess things to see if you feel the same way. Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 14Sep 10, 2008 2:19 pm Yeah, I think I’ll be ok. I mean, I am self-aware enough to realise that I just don’t cope well with change and am very sentimental, so those two things combined don’t bode well when you have to move house. lol
My main issues are that I love my area, but I simply cannot afford to buy here so it’s just not even a consideration right now. Apartments that are half the size of the one I bought are out of my price range in my current area. So I have to just adjust my thinking in that regard. Another issue is, as I said, the security. This will take time to get used to and I’m hoping it’ll be ok. If we have no break ins within the first few months and no trouble or weirdness, I think I’ll relax. They’re really the main ones, so yeah, I’ll be alright. I still have little sparks of excitement that flash through my mind, so that’s good. My partner is only just now beginning to get a bit stressed about moving. lol. I’ve been the one organising it all this whole time but I can’t take time off work (I only work part time anyway) next week when we actually move in, so she’s the one who’ll be there when they pack up our apartment and unload at the other end…I’m gonna have to write down totally detailed instructions so she knows without a shadow of any doubt where each and every piece of furniture is to be placed, since I can’t be there. lol How the hell did I become a senior member!? I know nothing! Re: Not satisfied despite beautiful renovations? 15Sep 10, 2008 4:10 pm grace_slick I’m gonna have to write down totally detailed instructions so she knows without a shadow of any doubt where each and every piece of furniture is to be placed, since I can’t be there. lol haha I know how you feel, my mum keeps wanting to unpack my boxes and I'm like, are you crazy? I'll just have to move everything afterwards! John wanted to know what to do when unpacking, I gave him the job of the tv/sound system, and computers. He's not allowed to do anything else... DIY, Home Maintenance & Repair Grind texture and paint off at blister up to top of fence Will see damp cement render 5 7307 of course there are legal avenues. You've already mentioned it. Sue them. I find it odd that lawyers wouldnt be willing to take on the case, given CCT evidence and… 1 24505 I work with owner, he/she is my man on the ground and I instruct them when to visit the site and take photos and I have other tools in the bag. 4 16303 |