Browse Forums Building A New House Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 3Aug 04, 2014 8:49 pm Custom downslope build Build thread viewtopic.php?f=31&t=61873 Blog http://www.buildingroyalmanor.blogspot.com.au Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 4Aug 04, 2014 9:00 pm People who aren't happy within themselves will always react to the good news of others in a less than positive way... It says more about them than it does about you. It happens in so many different forms, not just building houses! Someone loses weight, someone buys a new car, takes a holiday, gets married, has a baby, gets a promotion... God the list is endless on the things an insecure person will react badly to! It's happening all around us everyday and if we're all being totally honest, we've probably had moments when our lives aren't going so crash hot and we've felt a twingeof envy? Of course a twinge of envy that's fleeting vs. A full scale rude reaction is another thing, and definitely inexcusable, but again - that's their issue and not yours. Just be proud of what you're doing and try not to let it worry you, their issues go way beyond you building a new home. Thread: viewtopic.php?f=31&t=66299 Slab: 16/6/14 Frame: 4/7/14 Roof: 22/7/14 Lock Up: 20/8/14 Fixing: 26/8/14 PCI: 9/10/14 Handover: 20/10/14 Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 5Aug 04, 2014 9:45 pm I've only experienced it from my sister who is struggling on her own with kids and has had some housing issues, but I just felt badly for her and I don't bring it up now. I've experienced it myself when I was training for my career pretty much through my whole twenties and people would make snide remarks. Again, some people have made a few remarks about the size of our place but we just laugh. We have built it knowing that if some of our older relatives want to stay with us in their dotage they can. But I don't feel the need to explain myself either. Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 6Aug 04, 2014 9:48 pm It's a bit of a downer isn't it, you get so excited when you start seeing results for all your hard work and then bam! someone ruins your moment. Some people we know react like this to anything positive we do. We've just learnt to accept that it says more about them than us and we also just don't go to them with these things anymore. Thankfully not everyone is like this, we have friends and family that are equally as excited as we are and it's so great to share that feeling with them. Building a Sierra on the Gold Coast https://forum.homeone.com.au/viewtopic.php?f=31&t=68899 Full timeline on Pg 1 Settlement: 13/05/14 Retaining Walls: 20/06/14 Site Start: 02/07/14 Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 7Aug 05, 2014 12:17 am True friendships stand the test of time and there are many tests along the journey. Genuine support and encouragement defines both the friendship and the person. Just concentrate on this important part of your journey. Don't be distracted. 3in1 Supadiverta. Rainwater Harvesting Best Practice using syphonic drainage. Cleaner Neater Smarter Cheaper Supa Gutter Pumper. A low cost syphonic eaves gutter overflow solution. Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 8Aug 05, 2014 7:28 am We've experienced it to with family. Largely everyone we know is very happy for us but a couple of family members seem obviously resentful. They never ask a single question about our new home, they haven't ever been to see it and we're at lock up! It makes me sad that family can't think past themselves to be happy for people trey supposedly care about. Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 9Aug 05, 2014 9:55 am SaveH2O True friendships stand the test of time and there are many tests along the journey. Genuine support and encouragement defines both the friendship and the person. Just concentrate on this important part of your journey. Don't be distracted. If your friends are true they won't be jealous of you, if they are not they are not worth having. If you have found your own peace then you won't be jealous of anyone nor will you care what others think. Next time pray they find their own peace. I will never have private jet, nor 15M yacht in Victoria Harbour, nor the talents of other builders that have been wildly more successful than me but everything that is important to me I have and I am far better off than billions of others that are just surviving day by day or dying. How is that for a perspective? Foremost Building Expert in Australia,assisting with building problems/disputes, building stage inspections,pre-contract review advice for peace of mind 200 blogs http://www.buildingexpert.net.au/blog Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 10Aug 05, 2014 10:32 am Don't let it get to you. I think some of these comments are from jealousy plain and simple. I work very hard for my wage and I, like BE, will never have a Jet or other things and I am ok with that. I am also very happy for people that do have those things. Most of the choices I have made for my house is because I want certain things and as it is my money I will spend it wisely and as I see fit. I am lucky that my family and friends are supportive however if there is a snide remark I generally do not pay any attention as I do not want to get caught up and dragged down. Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 12Aug 06, 2014 12:10 am yes we have had this when we brought our block from my MIL "why not buy a house already established" I did explain that the type of house and area we were building would be way out of our reach financially but this was a way of achieving our dream house by buying the block and building adding pool etc down the track but she wasnt interested. Before I found this forum I would post photos on Facebook and get less and less interest from friends. It is like everything people get jelous and its ridiculous. We got engaged and married before building and I lost friends because my life was moving in direction they wanted before them etc. You really learn who your true friends are and who you can reley on. I used to hear everyone say how stressful building is and now I completely understand but when we are in our lovely new home all the stress will be forgotten about and it will be well worth it. Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 13Aug 06, 2014 6:46 am I think you need to create a new list to keep in your building folder. List all the people that you won't be talking to. BLOG: http://www.ourphoenix38.blogspot.com.au H1 THREAD: viewtopic.php?f=31&t=70454 Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 14Aug 06, 2014 10:42 am A lot of it just comes down to jealousy. I've experienced something similar in a round about way. Lodging DA's on behalf of clients regarding an extension, a new upper floor or a new house , the neighbours get a reduced copy of the elevations and site plan as part of the notification process. In a lot of instances objections to the DA have been lodged by them despite the fact there is no or very little shadowing, no overlooking of private spaces, no restriction on vehicular access to their properties or no loss of views etc etc. After the council has invariably approved the DA , when questioned the neighbours have come up with something like " I don't like it". Hmmm. Green is not a nice colour for some people. We have already crossed a few people off the list for our house warming party after we build our new place. And I don't have a problem with it at all. Stewie Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 15Aug 06, 2014 11:01 am Yep spot on Stewie, I actually rang my neighbour when the council contacted me and had one question about boundary walls but that was regarding the length. I knew the height was not an issue as it was not even as high as my second storey. I was curious how long it was and what bricks they were choosing. Just wanted to discuss how we will treat the neighbour side of the boundary walls. They see 9m of my wall and I see 6m of their wall along the same boundary. We agreed that each other can render to their taste. I know what people do on their property causes lots of issues but as long as its within guidelines then the issue is with the guideline makers not the home owner. I am sure there will be lots of opinions about my rooms being too big or having more than one ensuite is OTT but I really don't care what people think as its my decision and my choice and I will not be knocked down by it. Yes is good on a christmas tree or a front lawn, not that good on people. Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 16Aug 06, 2014 4:00 pm we've not got a lot of that from anyone, mainly family members. I make a point of sharing and asking for input with everyone instead of boring them with my excitement and build details. This has given some a keen interest in how things are progressing! For example, to show someone layout plans would be considered boring by most, try asking them what they would do with it if it were their house, you will get a myriad of ideas For some people,to see some of their ideas/opinions materialise into reality is quite a reward, and may even get them motivated to pursue the same thing. Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 17Aug 06, 2014 10:21 pm MyH1Login That's cr*p. They're cr*p. Move on and do not invite them for dinner when the house is built! Lol, that's funny. Thanks for making me smile Cath. Daydreamin' about our Daydream Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 18Aug 06, 2014 10:27 pm Wow. You guys are fantastic. I appreciate the time you've all taken to pass on your gems of wisdom to us and you're all right. I will indeed take all advice on board!! Kindest regards and many thank you's, Cath. Daydreamin' about our Daydream Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 19Aug 07, 2014 4:23 pm Oh I'm so glad I saw this post! I thought it was only me that was experiencing this. We built about 14 years ago and our family were very happy for us. Now is time for the 'dream' house and we have had a very frosty reaction from the family - with lots of snide comments. Very sad (for them not us) Re: Dealing with peoples' reactions to your building a new h 20Aug 07, 2014 5:05 pm there is another aspect to this - some people who are building cant help but rub others up the wrong way about it - EG they bang on about how much their marble tiles from Italy are costing, or their ebony floors, or how their home theater has cost a fortune in soundproofing for their 2000w hummel and klein audio set up. Sometimes those people deserve a punch in the face. As to those who are really casual about it, i get it, sometimes people are just jealous, and sometimes are disappointed that their life choices haven't put them where you are. I try to read my audience and adjust the conversation accordingly. Friends thinking about embarking on the journey are curious, poorer friends don't want to hear about it. if youre getting snide comments or jealousy try and asses what you've just said, or how you've been acting. Its quite often the source of why people respond the way they do (not the other way around). It can be very sobering when you get called out on it. Creator of superduperonium, expert at expert things, nobel laureate, can hold my breath for 10 minutes. Is it just a report written to give to the bank initially and it is based on what and how your payments are made up for, or is it a full service where they go out and… 2 5598 Hi Suku18 In NSW the statutory required insurances are: 1. HBCF ( Home Building Compensation Fund) - This is if the builder dies or goes broke. But this only covers 20%… 1 2709 |