This is not funny to anyone else......
You know you grew up in the eastern suburbs when......!
> * You celebrated all your family shindigs at Smorgys or Sizzlers and were appalled by anyone who didn't because, despite the obvious health risks, you thought it was unnatural to turn down such a bargain lunch
> > * You would boast to your girlfriends that you were dating one of the coolest guys around because they skateboarded near The Glen/Forrest Hill/Chaddy
> > * You loved spending Christmas Eve at Carols by Candlelight at Jells Park because it was an opportunity to hang out with all the kewl local youths
> > * You believed you were invincible to any school bullying because you know a friend of a friend who belonged to the Knox gang (no one would mess with you now!)
> > * As a rite of passage into adolescence, ALL your friends had worked at a local fast food joint or equivalent exploitative workplace. You all one day dreamed of working retail.
> >
> > - you have a '10% off drinks' loyalty card for the TAB at Century City Walk
> >
> > - a little part of you died when the 'Spew' closed down
> >
> > - you used to do the Glenferrie Hotel / Cheers combination for Toss the Boss on Tuesday nights, or if you're feeling classy, the Hawthorn / Room double for YoYos
> >
> > - you remember when Club Evolution was Commercial Lounge (and did $20 all you could drink for uni night Thursdays)
> >
> > * You go to 24hr Christmas shopping at Chaddy even though there's no parking and you don't intend on buying anything.
> >
> > * You took your boyfriend/girlfriend to Sky High for more then 'just the view'.
> >
> > * You are wrapped that zone 3 has been removed
> >
> > * You have stumbled out of the 'Wheelers' or the 'Hallam'
> >
> > * Every time you drive down Springvale rd passing Nunawading station.. the train happens to be crossing.
> >
> > * You know the whereabouts of Ramsay Street.
> >
> > * When you grow up.. you want to live in 'inner city East'.
> >
> > * You dress better then your friends (from the west) i.e. they still wear flares.
> >
> > * Anything on the other side of the westgate bridge is a hike.
> >
> > * You or someone you know has chucked up on the sth Eastern or Eastern freeway on the way home from clubbing.
> >
> > * You were not surprised by the riots at Noble Park Maccas.
> >
> > * Springvale Rd is no more then 10 minutes from your house.
> >
> > * You haven't been to Fountain Gate since Krispy Kremes became available everywhere.
> >
> > * You exit at Toorak Rd and NEVER use etag.
> >
> > * You refuse to accept that the 'derros' from Cranbourne are Eastsiders.
> >
> > * You are paranoid and wind up your windows and lock your doors once you get into the slums (westside).
> >
> > * You go to Burwood Kmart at 1am coz your bored or coz you can.
> >
> > * You've played ball at Dandenong/Kilsyth basketball stadium for your school/friends/local team.
> >
> > * You know what Wobbies World is.
> >
> > * Before you got your own DVD burner.. you bought all your movies/games from the ethnic blokes at Caribbean Market.
> >
> > * Being stuck in ridiculous peak hour traffic doesn't phase you.
> >
> > * You go to Eastland shopping centre as an absolute last resort.
> >
> > * Even as an absolute last resort.. you do not go to Dandy Plaza
> >
> > * You went to underage 'dance parties' at Jooce, Stylus, East 93, Moorabin town hall, Dandenong town hall, Clayton town hall.
> >
> > * You're glad Ozone was built on top of the 'old bus stop'.. this nearly wiped out the 'Bus stop gangsters'.
> >
> > * You've had a bbq/birthday/drink up at Jells/Burden park.
> >
> > * You have been to Caribbean Rollerama.. to roller blade of course (roller skates are for dweebs).
> >
> > * You catch the Lillydale/Cranbourne line and seem to travel back in time
> >
> > * You just wana slap the emos around at Ringwood Station
> >
> > * You go for coffee with friends at Shine (Upstairs) at Glenny even though it's as noisy as hell and there's no chance of understanding what the person sitting next to you is saying.
> >
> > * You then go for coffee at Airstream and its just as loud.
> >
> > * You're happy to pay $50+ for a cab home from town.
> >
> > * You have caught the Lilydale/Belgrave line and were either bashed, followed, sworn at or creeped out by some wierdo sitting way too close.
> >
> > * You don't slow down at Eastlink Roadworks unless there's a guy holding a 'SLOW' sign .
> >
> > * You have fought off chucking your guts on the Nightrider home.
> >
> > * You've enjoyed a movie in that kickass colosseum-style room at the Rivoli in Cambo.
> >
> > * You played netball or softball at Jells Park and remember when there were only outdoor courts.
> >
> > * You went to watch movies at Pinewood because all movies cost $3 but don't admit it.
> >
> > * You've chucked a hissy fit at some poor kid who works at Nunawading Maccas cos their soft serve machine is broken.. again.
> >
> > * You've laughed at one of the following:
> > -Hung Phat Auto Repairs on the Pakenham/ Cranbourne line
> > -Phuc Dat Butcher in Springvale
> > -Hung Long Video on Whitehorse Rd Box Hill
> > -Poo Ping Palace in Dingley
> > -Keith Fagg Tiles in Kilsyth
> > -Sha Tin Chinese take away at Heathmont shops
> >
> > * You've been to Donnie Pancake Parlour.. and think the radio ads for it at night with the stoners is retarded.
> >
> > * You know the 'real' names of Eastland (Beastland), Knox (Pox), Ozone (Hoe zone).
> >
> > * You are not surprised to find a Club X store right next to Baby co. in Baysy.
> >
> > * You don't find it confusing driving through Spaghetti junction (Princess hwy, Springvale rd, Police rd, Centre rd intersection).
> >
> > * You know that the 16 year olds around Ringwood/Dandy only had babies to get the baby bonus.